Good Sex God’s way: Relational and Embodied

Posted by on Apr 9, 2013 in Blog: Doing sex God’s way

God makes it very clear. We are sexual beings, male and female, before God and each other. It is the way we are created. This applies to our body, brain and behaviour. And it is good. In fact God thinks it is very good.

Let’s go where it all began, to the book of Genesis, in the Garden of Eden with Adam and Eve. God having created the earth and all the plants and animals looked around and saw that it was all good. Well, not quite. God decided that Adam, the first man being alone was actually ‘not good’ (Genesis 2:18). So, God created Eve. Now we have male and female.

Genesis 1:27-28

“Then God said, “Let us make mankind in our image, in our likeness, so that they may rule over the fish in the sea and the birds in the sky, over the livestock and all the wild animals, and over all the creatures that move along the ground.” So God created mankind in his own image, in the image of God he created them; male and female he created them. God blessed them and said to them, “Be fruitful and increase in number; fill the earth and subdue it.”

There are four pointers here to God’s plan for our sex life. Man and woman are created relational, embodied, for a purpose and sexual.

Created relational:

The ‘our’ in verse 27 is the Trinity – Father, Son and Holy Spirit. To bear God’s image means that as humans, we reflect the perfect, divine relationship of love in the Holy Trinity. The Father, Son and Holy Spirit show both unity and diversity in relating to one another. God wants us to enjoy life-giving relationships of total intimacy, trust and honesty, because he is himself a relational, life-giving God. He is relationship in himself – like the Apostle John says, he is love (1 John 4:16). And out of his love, he made this universe as a place of life – he created the plants and animals, and breathed the breath of life into humans. Real life – a feeling of being full, complete, and valued – comes from having healthy relationships. This is why we’re happiest when we feel safe and loved by another. Vertically we are completed by Gods love. And horizontally, we bend this love outwards and share it with others.

It is important however that we realise that while the love between a man and a woman as consummated in marriage is wonderful, it is not the only fulfilling relationship we can enjoy. Non-sexual intimate friendships are enriching and empowering. Ask any happy Christian single who is part of a vibrant Christian community.

Created embodied:

At creation, God designed male and female embodied: to live, find identity and serve God in and through human bodies. What happens in our bodies’ matters to God. Paul calls every believer to “honour God with your body” (1 Corinthians 6:20). This includes every part, especially those parts involved in sexual activity.

The couple in the Garden of Eden had a unique complementary character and identity (Genesis 1:27).  “He [God] created them male and female.” Adam and Eve were perfectly gendered as male and female – two discrete sexes at creation. Their bodies complementary in structure and function – as God ordained. Adam had a sculpted body with just the right amount of contoured muscles and wonderfully structured and functioning genitals, Eve, the perfect hourglass figure. Perfect breasts and just the right everything. And their sexual function, erections, arousal and orgasms would have been flawless. Adam and Eve would have been totally comfortable as male and female. Adam knew he was a male and Eve was a female; Eve likewise knew she was a female and Adam was a male; and they were both totally content with that. They weren’t stressed about who they were; they accepted themselves – their bodies, and their identity – as God had made them.

It was the scene for a perfect complementary relationship. Gods people in Gods place under God’s rule.